I dated the guys your mother warns you about
but she never told me I wouldn’t recognize him.
He didn’t wear a leather jacket, or smoke, or drink.
Instead he fashioned a warm smile, and
looked at me with eyes filled with greed that I
was mistaking with love.
The guy your mother warned you about will tell you
not to wear clothes that make you look good.
He will tell you inevitably another girl will always
wear it better. The guy my mother warned me about
liked to tell me not to eat, and he would cut out pictures
of models in the magazines and tell me
he can only love a girl who looks like that.
The guy your mother warned you about is terrifyingly strong.
He will grab you by the neck and try to kiss you,
and when you pull away he will say that you don’t love him.
As if the only way to prove affection is with physical contact.
Even if you try to explain to him that you want to wait,
it won’t be enough for the guy your mother warned you about.
And when he grabs you by the wrists, with hate in his eyes,
you will ask yourself what you ever did to deserve it.
It might take you years to realize, you never deserved it.
No one ever deserves it.
But one day you will meet the guy your mother tells you about.
The one she dreams that you will find.
The man who will make you feel as though the world
is spinning both in forward and reverse at the same time.
He will call you beautiful in anything you wear.
He will use his strength to make you feel safe, not for power.
He will hold your heart before he holds your hand.
And little by little he will help you find yourself again.